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Rules I Never Thought to Verbalize…Pt. I

You can’t put Sour Skittles on a tuna sandwich

You can’t wash the cat in the toilet

You can’t spread butter with a stick

You can’t cut through the screen on your bedroom window just to beat your brother to the swing

Don’t handcuff the dog

That should get us through the next week or so. I hope

Sometimes I wonder wth they teach my kid at school because the condensed version that he tells me is just crazy talk! 2 weeks ago
Nobody I know cares but I just met Kevin from the last season of Top Chef. He was just walking through the Forum shops when I accosted him! 3 weeks ago
Las Vegas. Day 1: it wasn't the nicest house but I loved it while I owned it. Good news though, they may let me keep the kids. 3 weeks ago
WTH was I thinking exercising so hard four days in a row? My body is rebelling. 3 weeks ago
Got "one of those calls" from the school that you never want to get. Luckily it was just a mix up! http://wp.me/phONV-2c 4 weeks ago